Spouse #1 and Spouse #2 wake up at different times.
Spouse #1 sets the alarm for very early to exercise. About 1 in 5 mornings Spouse #1 hits the snooze button. Repeatedly.
Spouse #2 considers each well-earned moment of sleep to be sacred and thinks snoozing of any kind should be outlawed.
Who’s the asshole?
Spouse #1 (husband)! Shakespeare probably wrote a sonnet about this but we’re too lazy to check our iPhone app.
Email your ridiculousness to:
adjudicatethis@gmail.com
Come on, you know you’re right!
Boyfriend and girlfriend leave the apartment at different times.
Significant Other #1 asks to be woken up by Significant Other #2 before Significant Other #2 leaves for the day.
Significant Other #2 does as requested by playing music. Significant Other #1 finds this method to be horribly excessive (made worse by Significant Other #2’s taste in music).
Who’s the asshole?
Significant Other #1 (boyfriend)! Because sometimes you got to walk that Lonesome Valley by yourself.
Email your ridiculousness to:
adjudicatethis@gmail.com
Come on, you know you’re right!
Spouse #1 and Spouse #2 bear each other’s vapors with varying degrees of patience.
Spouse #1 bristles at “gratuitous coughing”; drink water, pop a lozenge, bury your head in a pillow!
Spouse #2 believes you cough when you fucking cough.
Who’s the asshole?
Spouse #1 (husband)! You cough when you fucking cough. Never more, never less.
Email your ridiculousness to:
adjudicatethis@gmail.com
Come on, you know you’re right!
Spouse #1 and Spouse #2 like to order take-out. They argue however when there’s a chance the joint they want to order from is closed.
Spouse #1 thinks they should figure out what they want before they call with the expectation that the joint is open.
Spouse #2 thinks that’s a waste of time in case the joint is closed; call to discover that it’s open and then call back with the order.
Who’s the asshole?
Who's the Asshole? 